If StinkyLulu were the Oscar Fairy... (79th Academy Awards)

If StinkyLulu were the Oscar Fairy for the 79th Academy Awards, the following scenario might well occur:
click links below for visual fun
  • For Best Actor/Actress, instead of showing excerpts from nominated performances, nominees would be honored with clips from some of their most extraordinary work (ie. Leo; Forest;Peter; Ryan; Will; Helen; Judi; Kate; Meryl; Penelope).
  • The cast of Little Miss Sunshine would dance back-up during all performances of "Best Song" nominees. Host Ellen would, of course, dance lead.
  • A new video montage (perhaps instead of the death march by applause-o-meter, possibly in addition to it) would be added featuring all the performances that should have been nominated. O'course, StinkyLulu and you, lovely reader, would get to decide who would be included.
  • Ryan Seacrest would present "Best Supporting Actress" using AI's patented slow-mination, cutting the losers one by one - cutting to Coke commercials every other minute - thereby adding an additional 19 minutes to the broadcast.
  • Instead of a rapidly swelling orchestra cuing the winner that their designated time was up, The Debbie Allen Dancers would swarm around the recipient, inspiring and/or forcing the winner to shake their respective groove thing/s off the stage.
  • Patrick Wilson gets this year's Special "Thanks for the Nekkid" Award (NSFW 1 & 2).
  • LOTS of surprises to "Spoil the Pool" at Oscar parties everywhere.
  • Abigail Breslin gets to wear StinkyLulu's special "Princess of the Party" tiara.
  • Philip Seymour Hoffman would just go away.
  • The accountants from Price-Waterhouse would interrupt the presentation of "Best Picture" with an announcement that, in an unprecedented groudswell of a write-in vote, Children of Men actually received the majority of votes for Best Picture. Chaos -- and madcap hilarity -- would then ensue...
All told, it would certainly be a Lulu of a time.
That is, if StinkyLulu were the Oscar Fairy...

1 comment:


that really would be quite a party

ryan seacrest elimination? priceless