Lulu's Stinky Picks: Big Brother 7 - All Stars

In the summer of 2000, when everyone got all gaga over the first season of Survivor, StinkyLulu fell in love with a different CBS show: the lower-than-lowbrow reality fandango, Big Brother. Ever since -- through dizzying schedule shifts, the evolution of the ChenBot, each cast's ever increasing idiocy -- StinkyLulu has (somewhat inexplicably) remained a devoted fan. And this season -- a purported "All-Star" edition in which past "hamsters" are invited back for one more shot at the $500k -- lowly idiot-boxers like Lulu get to vote on who'll get locked in a house (really a series of conjoined trailers) on a Hollywood backlot somewhere... Well. Suffice it -- Lulu's just gosh-darned excited. (It's summer on the teevee!!!) And after much deliberation, StinkyLulu has settled on...

Lulu's Stinky Picks for Big Brother 7:

Bunky is just the definition of "duh-Rama" (hairiest back ever notwithstanding). Way back when, Lulu termed him "that sobbing sissy"cuz...goodness. Lulu was leaning toward the bunkster as an early sacrificial hamster, and now that StinkyLulu's aware of the reddish68 connection... itsa done deal that Lulu wants the crybaby in the mix.
Danielle -- one of the best BBers ever. Totally smart, naturally beautiful, sneakier than sneaky. Gives good diaryroom. A house with Danielle'll bring on the entertainment.

Janelle -- whose signature "Bye bye, bitches" established her as the only legendary BBer. A bimbo with brains and ability. Among her competitors, Janelle inspires loathing and fear in equal measure -- what's not to love?
Jase -- the only truly awful BBer who was also truly entertaining. His preening macho preciousness remains one of the funniest BB running gags (!) ever...

Nakomis -- if not for the appalling Cowboy "twin twist" Nakomis would've likely never made it on BB at all. Too normal, plus her commonsense quirkiness trips up the skulking of the average famewhore. Plus she -- like Danielle & Janelle -- really gamed the game... Good times.
Will -- arrogant & clever & vain beyond all measure. Sure he won, but -- golly -- it'd be great (a) to watch Janelle/Danielle/Nakomis wipe the floor with his pompousness OR (b) to see him really play the game against equally devious competition. Plus he's pretty in an underwear model kind of way. And it would be fun to see him & Jase in a manscaping competition...
Golly. It's gonna be fun. (Now if only StinkyLulu could figure out how the voting actually works and/or when the dang show's agonna be on...)

1 comment:

Dreamlover said...

I can't wait for bb7 to start.